Reclaiming our spirit – some thoughts on alcohol and self-love

I’ve been pondering humanity’s troubled relationship with alcohol more deeply than ever, this last 18 months, since I stopped consuming it myself. Partly because the clarity of hindsight has allowed me to newly appreciate, and own, how alcohol was the bane of my life for just so many years; really, its consumption underlay some of the very worst experiences (and behaviours) of my life. In fact all of my biggest traumas except those relating to loss of a loved one had their foundations on a rock bed of alcohol-induced behaviours including some monumentally poor decisions and mindsets that had very far-reaching effects. The most pervasive of these was as a result of how alcohol imparted a subtle yet deadly sense of self-loathing that became deeper, more innocuous, year-on-year; only to be remembered like a faintly ringing Pavlov’s bell each time I took another drink and thus snowballed into even more self-denigration with each occasion.

In amongst the many causes of such self-directed bitterness was the fact I knew, not so very deep down, that the drink I consumed (yes, even if it was now only a couple of glasses a week..) set my longed-for recovery back in yards and sometimes miles…Yet I still did this thing as though I couldn’t stop myself, as though it was beyond the reach of such logic or rules, stood on its own little platform of most guarded behaviour, the untouchable of all bad habits. I would give up almost anything but, no, not this. I made Screen Shot 2017-05-22 at 10.54.46excuses for it, made it sound gentile and sociable, like a connoisseur ingredient or the great leveler of people. The havoc it wreaked on my otherwise patient and persistent attempts to achieve health equilibrium were not so gentile; I was chemically sensitive, intolerant to sugar and wheat yet prepared to imbibe this stuff packed full of sulphites and worse. Meanwhile, the more I felt somehow sullied by the habit, the more I felt compelled to pursue it…until the wake up of my consciousness allowed me to see some truths around this thing. It started to show me how drinking consistently marked the end of celebration, the down-turn in my evenings, the point where my tongue spoke free-wheeling gibberish instead of flowing inspiration, where my natural exuberance became conditional, weary or jaded and (not so ironically) my overflowing glass of life distorted to appear somewhat on the empty side until my head was allowed to clear once again.

It came as such a relief, one day, to quietly and without fanfare decide that I had had enough, that the effects simply weren’t worth it, that the show – for me – was over. Joined by my husband, we just as quietly ceased our subscription to a wine club, gave away all our glassware and offered our stash to our friends. There was that sense of relief you get when you send a bad boyfriend packing; long overdue and such a feeling of quiet empowerment washing in to fill that void. With a sigh, I am at last at liberty to speak out about just how unhealthy that relationship really was!

In fact, this many months along the line, quite aside from the fact my health feels so (so so so)  much better, more stable, without the weekly yo-yo in return for that large glass of red, I have never felt more resolved that this is a life-choice, not a passing whim. A sense of “missing out” when on holiday or in a restaurant has long since passed me by along with any sense that having a good time is not possible without it; in fact the opposite is true, I have never felt more relaxed in social settings.

It’s also a topic on my mind as my daughter (so far not a drinker) comes of age and starts to feel that societal push to do what everyone else does and join in the party. Thus far, and in fact in her own mind, she has no desire whatsoever to drink (a choice that long-predates my own decision to give up the bottle). Yet now that she approaches university age, she feels the tug to succumb to “the norm” as some sort of inevitability on the horizon like getting a job or learning to drive; almost like it is a necessity for social survival…and I hate that, loathe the cultural thumb screws that make any young person feel they must do as the herd do or be extricated. How has such behaviour got anything to do with pleasure and relaxation and why has a willingness to get inebriated got anything to do with acceptability or social prowess (or is it just that those who do can’t stand anyone else soberly watching as they make fools of themselves); yet our youngsters have never been under more pressure to conform to these social expectations if they want to avoid marginalisation and being deemed too uncool to have friends.

I have also been more interested than ever in the great mystery of “why” we drink alcohol  because it, to me, so clearly represents the Sixth Wave of our evolution, of which it is a master tool. If you are not familiar with what the Sixth Wave is (I refer you to the first of my various posts on the topic), in summary, it is the era that saw the left hemispheral viewpoint “take over” our world, distracting us from being spiritual beings aware that we are in direct communiqué with the divine towards the perspective of a world obsessed with logic, materialism and control. Early last year (shortly after giving up on drink myself), when I was deep-diving into our Fifth Wave ancestors by reading a series of essays about the nomadic tribes that followed the reindeer, I sat up and took note when I read one article describe just how deliberate that introduction of “drinks that inebriate” was as a means of disconnecting us from ourselves, causing us to forget who we truly were and making us so much more malleable at the hands of those who had designs on controlling that new invention set to take over our world – monetary wealth. Sure enough, as an instrument of controlling the masses whilst disengaging us from our most spiritual selves (and bringing out our worst side), alcohol has been second to none. Under its influence, we have been dumbed down and herded like cattle for six thousand years…so, now we are into a new age on the brink of an evolutionary leap, perhaps it is well overdue for a timely decline (though I’m sure its advertisers, and those behind its vast industry, will kick back with all they have). I know these things for sure – the path to recovery requires that you take back your personal power, your responsiblity for your own health and that you unconditionally love (and respect) yourself; none of which are consistent with what alcohol, voluntarily, does to the body each time we consume it.

In light of such ponderings, the article that I tripped upon today, which covers in much more detail many of the themes I refer to here, including the dubious beginnings of our relationship with alcohol, is an interesting read. With this quote to entice you to read on and, perhaps, shed a little circumspection on this very bizarre topic (why oh why do we give ourselves over to this stuff?), I will pass you on to the article by Zahra Sitta with the encouragement that it is well worth the read.

It is a known by many that ingesting alcohol depresses the nervous system, kills brain cells, is toxic to the liver, weakens the immune system, and has many other harmful effects. We are taught that long-term alcohol use can lead to unwanted weight gain, diseases of the liver, lowering of intelligence, and negative effects on hormones. Drinking alcohol while pregnant can lead to birth defects, mental retardation, and deformities in the developing fetus. Yet still, it is mass promoted and supported by our mainstream culture. Have you ever considered that alcohol is a slick tool of the supporters of the Matrix (global mind control and oppression program) to keep people on a path of disempowerment and sickness?

The word origin speaks volumes:

The word “Alcohol” comes from the Arabic “al-kuhl” which means “BODY EATING SPIRIT”, and gives root origins to the English term for “ghoul”. In Middle Eastern folklore, a “ghoul” is an evil demon thought to eat human bodies, either as stolen corpses or as children.

Al kol: Genie or spirit that takes on varied shapes or a supernatural creature in Arabic mythology.
Al kol: Any drug or substance that takes away the mind or covers it.”
The word alcohol is also linked to the fixed star in astronomy known as Algol- also known as “the Demon’s head.”
The current Arabic name for alcohol (ethanol) is الغول al-ġawl – properly meaning “spirit” or “demon”.

Extracts from Alcohol Consumption and Spirit Possession

Banner image created by Mrsiraphol –

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