overexcitability

Learning to slow down

~ Helen White ~ Leave a comment

Letting a day of nothing in particular be an accomplishment, even more so than a day of “productivity”, is a necessary mind re-program I am steadily adopting for my health. Allowing myself to feel equally good about myself and, most importantly, relaxed because I managed to go slow today rather than ticking things off a list is a crucial reinvention of myself on the way towards, somewhere down the line, reaping a far healthier nervous system than I ever had in my life. I’m playing the long game now, the fruits of my labours no longer some transient thrill gained from fighting down another dragon but the slow and steady harvest gained from peaceful seeds planted in the ground on some equally slow and steady day and all the intervening patience I had to watch them grow. 

Big emotions at the root of “chronic”

~ Helen White ~ 2 Comments

If TMS is behind your chronic condition then, until you accept this and take the necessary action, you’re unlikely to move on. You have to believe in it, commit to doing the work and garner the faith that you can and will get well again. You have to let go of any negative feelings that arise from the realisation you’ve been caught in your own mind-trap all these years because it really wasn’t your fault as you had no idea and the brain is extremely good at doing this thing that it does to distract you from intense emotions with symptoms (and utterly convinced it is doing the right thing; that your very survival depends on it, thus it gives it everything it’s got). That’s a huge amount to contend with; the odds were stacked against you all along, but not anymore, now you know and can learn the tools for healing.

Don’t underestimate B12 deficiency, ever!

~ Helen White ~ 2 Comments

Its a message I ingrained into myself years ago, when I read a book on the topic cover-to-cover in an afternoon and heard all the numerous, often subtle, frequently devastating symptoms of B12 deficiency and yet, though I pursued a vegetarian and vegan diet for many years, and continued to present with a multitude of … Continue reading Don’t underestimate B12 deficiency, ever!

Worrying or stimming? Looking at an overactive mind from a neurdodivergent point of view

~ Helen White ~ Leave a comment

From what I can tell, neurodiverse criteria for getting a good night's sleep can be very different to "norm"...and we may not be as anxious as we seem, measured by usual criteria. So how can we tell when we are worrying compared to when just NEED to stimulate ourselves awake in the middle of the night (and why might that be)?

When your autistic health is minutely synced to the (apparently discombobulated) seasons

~ Helen White ~ Leave a comment

When you thrive on predictability, how does your body cope with delayed or oddly-behaving seasons? Or with prolongued transitions? Or when "feeling too much" and energy overload (ironically) translate as deficit? Exploring the effect of seasonal changes from a neurodivergent perspective.

Why chronic fatigue syndrome is such a painfully inadequate label and considering how ME/CFS may be connected to neurodiversity

~ Helen White ~ 2 Comments

What's in a label and looking at the bigger picture: Considering the importance of using the right descriptor when conveying the seriousness of your condition to yourself and others whilst exploring a possible link between CFS / ME and neurodiversity.

No sleep (a middle aged female angle)

~ Helen White ~ 3 Comments

Middle of the night thinking-aloud about the links between insomnia, autism, oxalates, vulvodynia and interstitial cystitis, chronic pain, environmental sensitivities, low to borderline thiamine B1 levels and feeling like you want to jump out of your skin!

A lifetime fuelled by pain and frustration: handling the emotional fallout of long-term undiagnosed autism

~ Helen White ~ 2 Comments

A combination of having a blind spot when it comes to your own emotions (alexithymia) and a lifetime of fear around unleashing strong emotions.not to mention the stockpile of anger, frustration and trauma from all the difficult years before diagnosis, can conspire to push strong emotions deep into the body. Exploring how autistic challenges such as these could manifest as chronic illness and especially chronic pain.

Autism and feeling too much (not too little)

~ Helen White ~ Leave a comment

There are so many areas of human experience where autism is assumed to mean less than or shortfall whereas it’s often a case of more…so much more that it’s untenable and excruciating to be in the experience. Sometimes, the very appearance of so-called shortfall should prompt the question “is way too much going on in there, so much so that it can’t be handled or made sense of, can’t be articulated or processed in conventional ways?”.

Freeze response: the intersection of autism, trauma and chronic illness

~ Helen White ~ 4 Comments

What happens when huge amounts of energy get stuck in the body as trauma, leading to a freeze response or shutdown? How does this intersect with chronic conditions such as CFS, fibromyalgia, sensory defensiveness or other syndromes and does being autistic make you more prone to this? How can somatic therapies be used to discharge years of trauma? Exploring through my own deep-dive into the territory.