Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria is debilitating, devastating, isolating and often quite unbearable and yet nobody that has not experienced it for themselves can imagine what it truly feels like on the inside; there is no point of reference for anyone that isn't wired that way since it is the product of particular genetics plus epigenetics combined with a lifetime of trauma. As a common experience of both autism and ADHD and something I experience myself, this important topic has been on my list of most daunting things to cover for quite some time...here goes.
Nurodivergents and neurotypicals are sometimes poles apart in their communication styles but imagine if we could just try to meet on some common ground whilst accepting those differences (that last part is key…nobody should be required to change themselves). Isn’t this exactly where the best hopes of humanity lie, as in, meeting across the so-called impossible divide?
Environment is such a big topic when it comes to chronic illness, perhaps an obvious one too but I also think far too many people with chronic health problems get so wrapped up in their own situation that they fall into the trap of imagining all their problems stem from a faulty body. Even when they do realise the environment may be playing a considerable part, they don't seem to see what the issues are or they assume there is nothing that can be done about it, but that's not entirely true...awareness always leads to choices we may have overlooked.
Learning to live with any of the syndromes (CFS, POTs, fibro, CSS, EDS, MCAS, to name but a few) can be incredibly tough. From dealing with doubters and denial, discrimination, misunderstanding, thoughtlessness, rejection, loneliness, fear, self-doubt and all the other rigours of long term chronic illness, this post takes a look at it all.
When an emotion gets buried in the body, what does it look like years later and are there links to chronic health conditions? How are unidentiified autism or ADHD linked to fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue, as is emerging? What is our body trying to tell us when it seems so "stuck" and is this a clue to our recovery?
In Ehlers Danlos, muscle spasm and rigidity is a compensatory measure for hypermobility, to stabilise the joint. As such, it stems from a different cause to what is typical (not tightness as for most people but a response from the central and peripheral nervous system) and thus requires a different approach, but what? Exploring the possibilities via therapy and listening to your own body as a primary approach.
I was at an outdoor concert in an idyllic setting listening to some of my favourite music and yet, less than 5 minutes into it, I realised some part of me was screaming an existential scream, knowing I was going to be sat there like this for the next couple of hours. Admitting I have ADHD, that I am wired to need more dopamine than most, that I am rewarded by all kinds of stims (and not all are created equal...plus some are much harder to come by when your health is compromised) is proving to be a massive step towards understanding chronic illness, how it came about and why it perpetuates.
Some of us have thinner boundaries, we perceive more and process far more deeply but is this a mistake, a curse or an error in our makeup...or are we simply looking at this all wrong?
When you live with EDS, MCAS, POTS or any of the several forms of neurodiversity its so important never to cease experimenting with what triggers or supports you best as your particular mix of ideal exposures and conditions is likely to be quite different to the next person's. Take, for instance, the effects of the sun...
When extra intelligence, intensity and sensitivity cross over, they make quite the package...and it can be extremely challenging! Exploring what this looks like, and how to work positively with these traits. for ever-increasing fulfilment and joy.