If you have a vata dominance, how do you ground that airy, high-spirited, out-there, mercurial constitution long enough to find your way about in a physical body...and then stay there in a way that feels comfortable and sustainable? Here's what I've learned so far:
Tuning into your own most-treasured time of "void", of a feeling you once stored-up for such a day as this, a distant memory of what it truly feels like to have nothing to do and nowhere to go can be such a gift to yourself. Especially if you can allow yourself to accept it as it is, on behalf of who you are right now, not making it about nostalgia as though you are trying to recapture some long-lost essence of your past when "life was better" or "you were more deserving of it". The biggest challenge is to allow it, to really give yourself over to it and not seek to make it into another project by orchestrating it or making it conditional. How easy do we find it to be in void and not allow the mind to seek something to do, to worry about or a way to make the time more "useful" or "constructive" (as we tend to regard it when we constantly keep ourselves busy)? Yet empty space is anything but lacking in use; and it might be the very thing we are needing most, the refinding of which will be the missing jigsaw piece that makes all else suddenly fit together. Like the hidden portal we couldn't see for looking, it might be the doorway to exactly where we were trying so hard to get to with our minds...and there it was, all the time.
Probably the most definitive post about healing that I have ever shared....too vast to summarise so why not dive into a little taste of everything I have come to know.
In the midst of health crisis, you develop confidence in who you are; more confidence than you have ever had in your life before. You move into greater flow, clarity and understanding. Everything seems to come together. Synchronicities orchestrate your life with such perfection. Experience expands even as (you know) others look at your life and see it as smaller than it once was. In time…just give it time as the body is the slowest vibrating part of you…all of this feeds straight back into the body’s cells and starts to inform a whole new reality at the physical level. If your physical crashes feel as intense as they always were (perhaps more so), maybe it is because of the contrast with how rapidly you are now vibrating in the nonphysical dimensions; perhaps you can allow that there is a perfection, not a problem, going on and you are having to integrate a massive change into your physical vehicle, which might take just a little practice before it becomes smooth and seamless.
Its easy loving self when life is going smoothly; what about when its not, when the body (for instance) throws you a curve ball at the most inconvenient moment. I realised that this thing I thought I had, long-ago, achieved like I was the grand master of this very thing - a state of total SELF-LOVE and ACCEPTANCE - was a smokescreen for a more pervasive layer of self-judgement that was still lurking in there. I thought I had this thing off to a fine art yet I could now see how I was still holding it in; within the very depths of my being like the Loch Ness Monster beneath the pristine waterline. One rocky day in my "boat" and it was still waiting there to gobble me up....
Here's what's new and long overdue in terms of fully owning it...to others as well as myself. Whatever weird and wonderful experiences I'm having, I'm not fearing it. I'm not buying into any catastrophes around it. I'm not looking to anyone to tell me what is happening, though its always good to find others amongst this first "physical wave" of ascension that know what you're talking about (remembering that not everyone is on the same page or specialising in this aspect of evolution since we all have different themes we are working on). I'm not apologising to anyone for what I am experiencing; am certainly not embarrassed by it or thinking I am doing anything wrong, failing to "let-go, to "clear my shit" or any of the other "work" that people love to talk about; I'm so done with thinking I have to work on myself. In fact, I'm not assuming anything is going wrong at all or dashing to the doctors, taking pills or seeking out an endless array of teachers to "save me". I'm not interpreting this as any one of a zillion popular forms of victimhood that I could label it under or seeing it as a sign of weakness or regression. I KNOW I'm not regressing because I am so clearly evolving....and I know and celebrate this with every fibre of my being. (Read on...)
That thing that I do most(!) mornings on my yoga mat probably doesn't bear scrutiny from anyone who attends a yoga class or really knows their stuff...its not "proper", its not pretty, its not lengthy, its just what I do (a mixture of what I've learned, what feels good, movements I've half invented); but the key is in the words "I do it". I know of plenty of yoga aficionados who still only do yoga when they go to a class. Sometimes I roll movements together so much I feel like I'm a butterfly about to take off then, at other times, I use long pauses and gravity to do the work with me, holding positions until my body tells me to stop, a method that can deliver exquisite release to some of the deepest entanglements. The sense of fine tuning what my body is most asking for, to my own rhythm, has been palpable and the real gift of home practice; being unique to me and that most-intimate inner dialogue (the one that starts with the invitation "show me what you want and I will do that" without uttering a word) and not something that could follow the rhythm of a teacher or class. A conversation such as this, based utterly upon trust, is one that never (ever) stops again but, rather, carries on spreading its magic across all aspects of your daily life. Approaching yoga in this ad-hoc way, the mat remains somewhere that I'm accomplished, doing something that its impossible for me to do wrong or badly (which is a good starting point to get to know this truth about all of life). In listening to my body, what it wants, what it calls out for (today...which may not be the same as yesterday), I do something that is a central tenet of what yoga is all about and that takes me into that same hallowed space where the alchemy of yoga really happens. Like a meditation or a pause for breath, a moment of grace in a life that can be physically challenging, a demonstration of pure self-love and of listening to what my body is telling me, I get there...all on my own.