Deepest relief

Tuning into your own most-treasured time of "void", of a feeling you once stored-up for such a day as this, a distant memory of what it truly feels like to have nothing to do and nowhere to go can be such a gift to yourself. Especially if you can allow yourself to accept it as it is, on behalf of who you are right now, not making it about nostalgia as though you are trying to recapture some long-lost essence of your past when "life was better" or "you were more deserving of it". The biggest challenge is to allow it, to really give yourself over to it and not seek to make it into another project by orchestrating it or making it conditional. How easy do we find it to be in void and not allow the mind to seek something to do, to worry about or a way to make the time more "useful" or "constructive" (as we tend to regard it when we constantly keep ourselves busy)? Yet empty space is anything but lacking in use; and it might be the very thing we are needing most, the refinding of which will be the missing jigsaw piece that makes all else suddenly fit together. Like the hidden portal  we couldn't see for looking, it might be the doorway to exactly where we were trying so hard to get to with our minds...and there it was, all the time.

Yoga-ish

That thing that I do most(!) mornings on my yoga mat probably doesn't bear scrutiny from anyone who attends a yoga class or really knows their stuff...its not "proper", its not pretty, its not lengthy, its just what I do (a mixture of what I've learned, what feels good, movements I've half invented); but the key is in the words "I do it". I know of plenty of yoga aficionados who still only do yoga when they go to a class. Sometimes I roll movements together so much I feel like I'm a butterfly about to take off then, at other times, I use long pauses and gravity to do the work with me, holding positions until my body tells me to stop, a method that can deliver exquisite release to some of the deepest entanglements. The sense of fine tuning what my body is most asking for, to my own rhythm, has been palpable and the real gift of home practice; being unique to me and that most-intimate inner dialogue (the one that starts with the invitation "show me what you want and I will do that" without uttering a word) and not something that could follow the rhythm of a teacher or class. A conversation such as this, based utterly upon trust, is one that never (ever) stops again but, rather, carries on spreading its magic across all aspects of your daily life. Approaching yoga in this ad-hoc way, the mat remains somewhere that I'm accomplished, doing something that its impossible for me to do wrong or badly (which is a good starting point to get to know this truth about all of life). In listening to my body, what it wants, what it calls out for (today...which may not be the same as yesterday), I do something that is a central tenet of what yoga is all about and that takes me into that same hallowed space where the alchemy of yoga really happens. Like a meditation or a pause for breath, a moment of grace in a life that can be physically challenging, a demonstration of pure self-love and of listening to what my body is telling me, I get there...all on my own.

Don’t be SAD…

If you are a 'sufferer' from SAD (seasonal affective disorder) this is your loud and clear invitation to consider ways (and here's a whole treasure-trove of them, gathered through my own personal experience) that you get to create a very different experience; consciously, through choice. Suddenly, a seemingly endless procession of gloomy days doesn't seem all that gloomy anymore but, rather, has become the very playground of creating your own best experience - and not just in this rather trivial-seeming way but in all things, putting you back in the driving seat as the creator of your own best possible life.

Its not your fault, you aren’t doing anything wrong…

Lets get this straight - when you have fibromyalgia or any other chronic issue going on, you are no more broken, missing the point, off-track, lost, wrong, misguided, less-than, flawed or misaligned than the next person. It was nothing that you did or didn't do that "caused" this and, no, expressing (truly) how you feel about it is not halting your progress on some imagined journey to wholeness on which you feel you've got to pretend its all "great" along the way. Imagine if you are already there - fully aligned with your highest purpose, exactly where you are meant to be - and are allowed to feel all that stuff, to say it like it is - warts and all - and to give voice to everything that is going on for you, without apology or fear of consequences - how self-loving is that? From that place (where you already are), you can dump all the self-blame, the finger-pointing and, yes, the inner chastisement that stops you from feeling, allowing and EXPRESSING it all, including all the frustration, the disappointment, the unspeakable pain that halts you in your tracks when you want to be dancing. Maybe, just maybe, that's where the biggest gift of them all is awaiting you - as you unleash the voice that wants to say it exactly like it is in this perfectly imperfect moment of now!

When life becomes a tangle, don’t lose your hair!

Saturday mornings are a time when I luxuriate in the slower pace, in the self-turned attention and the pull-back from routine and this morning was no exception. The birds woke me at five and it felt like I had run out of sleep so  I lay there in quiet meditation, then listened to an uplifting … Continue reading When life becomes a tangle, don’t lose your hair!

Breathe. Be in this moment.

Birthdays can be such profound time of year for grasping some some of the broader truths of this existence. On mine, the other day, I was at once receiving well-wishing messages as I was receiving updates on a Facebook thread I had commented on that morning, posted by a friend whose elderly father was slipping … Continue reading Breathe. Be in this moment.