psychology

Living autism

~ Helen White ~ 2 Comments

When the time comes to finally live the autistic life, it can feel both daunting yet potentially liberating but how to go about it. We are forced to question which reality is the real one, the one where we normalise successfully and do all the stuff that looks like having a relatable life (through the eyes of other people) but with terrible outcomes for health, or the one where we are fully cognisant of our autistic traits, meaning that we accommodate them so much better but also meaning that our life inevitably looks much more withdrawn, carefully curated and (yes) autistic by default? In this post I explore questions such as whether and why to seek a formal diagnosis and how to reset social expectations and other boundary issues as I venture boldly into the territory.

The fact I “seem” to be coping with the big event doesn’t mean that I really am!

~ Helen White ~ Leave a comment

My hypermobile neurodivergent way of getting through an event might not be typical and will generally involve a lot of extra strategy and accommodations but it is just as valid as the next person's and, the more I own this, the less disappointed I am with myself or my circumstances. The world does not, in any large way, accommodate people with neurodivergent sensory responses to the environment or their not insubstantial neurological or physical differences, especially if hypermobile, therefore big events are seldom pitched to accommodate us, as a minority factor in the room. The very best I can do is have my own list of helpful methods and tools at hand to get me through these big events my way whenever they happen, with a view to minimising the worst kinds of after effects sufficiently enough for me to be able to hold on to the happy highlights instead of all the low points. Here are a few of my tips to myself in case they are of use to anyone else.

hEDS and “energy flu”

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I’ve been calling it “energy flu” for decades but what I mean by this is when the environment changes and I sense it through every tissue and fibre of my hypermobile body and it affects me…affects literally all of me, like I’ve walked in or out of a pressure chamber and nothing is quite normal whilst I adjust. Talking about hEDS in relation to an increased sensitivity to environmental shifts, how this impacts sensations, symptom load such as pain and dysautonomias, functional ability, executive function and more and things you could possibly consider as a better way of managing these episodes.

How long awaited hEDS diagnosis actually FEELS

~ Helen White ~ 2 Comments

So as it turns out, I'm not lazy, not hypochondriac, not a malingerer, not attention seeking, not making it all up, not interfering where I shouldn't, not feeble (far from it), not "over-sensitive" (ditto), not making a hobby or a hyperfocus out of illness, not collecting labels, not depressed nor anxious (except when the circumstances themselves pushed me that way), not trying too little nor doing it all wrong, not lost in self-absorption, not avoiding being a grown-up...or alive. I have been dealing with a complex multi-systemic health condition with as much grace and determination as I could muster on a daily basis. Unpacking some of the emotions of receiving a long awaited diagnosis.

When chronic fatigue meets an ADHD brain

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Just like it’s much harder for a hypermobile person to recover from an extended period of inactivity and lack of appropriate load-bearing (since I learned this the hard way, I have now heard it coorroberated by many reliable sources of hypermobility-meets-chronic fatigue information) I suspect it’s much harder for a neurodivergent person to recover from extended lack of cognitive load bearing. In fact, across both areas, my whole view of pacing has had to be changed since I was busy writing about it last year, with my source information taken from more neurotypical outlets at that time. So what’s important here is to "use it" in order not to "lose it"…yes…but to adapt the way we “use” and “move” to what we can genuinely cope with at this time, be it recumbent exercise or micro dosed cognitive excursions that we enjoy but don't sustain for too long at a time.

Reframing PEM and considering how it may be linked to delayed emotional and sensory processing in autism

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How could having more sensory information to process than the next person and delayed emotional processing have to do with post exertional malaise or delayed onset pain and what could any connection between them tell us about PEM so that we can reframe it in a more positive light?

Super syndrome: taking a unified approach to all the things

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What if there is a constellation of frequently overlapping health “things” that some of us have going on, all of them connected together so deeply and intrinsically that it makes a nonsense to consider them in a piecemeal fashion? Looking into the findings of a couple of neurodivergent medical professionals who share this view I have so long held and ways we can use the information to further our self-understanding and thus empower ourselves.

ME/CFS and neurodivergence: a potential overlap?

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There are so many overlaps between ME/CFS with common neurodivergent factors such as extreme sensory sensitivity and environmental challenges, increased hypermobility, porosity and laxity, orthostatic challenges such as POTs, increased susceptibility to viruses and adverse medical side-effects, sometimes lifelong energy deficits and frequent burnout events that, surely, the question needs to be asked...is there a credible link between neurodivergence and having an increased propensity to develop the condition? If so, how do you single them out; is it even viable to try and view the one factor in isolation from the other if they now coexist side-by-side, as they clearly do for me, or is the better headway always made once they are viewed as a kind of package of tricky responses to "life" as we know it.

Accommodating both sides of AuDHD is a must!

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If you are AuDHD and a situation that is meant to be working out for you is actually overwhelming you more than its helping, is too mentally, physically or emotionally stimulating, pressing buttons and resulting in repeated fatigue or symptoms that suggest your triggers are increasing, not backing off then you need to question whether its right for all the various parts of you. It's just so easy to be led off down a path of becoming overstimulated, thinking you can cope because you are ADHD or must push through when you can’t (I believe we AuDHDers really do require more rest and recovery to cope with our complex nervous system), never forgetting, except at our peril, that there is always that other factor to appease…the autistic side!