Some of us, perhaps especially women, have orchestrated our lives to be loners (sometimes, even in a crowd); a desire that has perhaps been coloured by our early life experiences of being in a group. For a time, this can feel necessary and healing but we should never take for granted that this is the way it has to be forever. The key is to question, do I actually want to be alone all, or most, of the time or have I settled for this due to it feeling like there is no alternative? Are there parts of myself I’m not exploring because of the fact I avoid being in a group context (because of what happened before…) and am I ready now to push my own boundaries and go there, undeterred by stories of the past?