The importance of finding your place

So many of us put up with living in less than ideal places and circumstances, especially if we feel we are stuck with them, but what if they are the missing piece of the whole health jigsaw. If we also happen to be neurodivergent, feeling "out of place" can be become such an innocuous-seeming sensation across the course of a lifetime because we become so acclimatised to feeling like a misfit in a lot of situations; our version of "normal". This makes it all too easy to ignore times when we are really in the wrong place or situation, when we should be doing something about it, especially when our health is being badly impacted. Clues might be subtle but we, of all people, are past masters at piecing together all the signs and patterns that tell us there is a better kind of life waiting for us somewhere, one that better fits the way we are wired.

The sustained traumatising effect of trying to lead a “normal” sensory life with a neurodivergent nervous system

I do believe that constantly drip-fed overstimulation traumatises those of us without appropriate filters and barriers to cope with sensory experiences that are not designed to accommodate neurodivergence and in such a way that compounds with time, affecting us in ways that other people can’t even begin to imagine as they’re simply not having the same experience as us. Quite literally, the only thing we have in common with the majority of people who are apparently dealing with the exact same situations as us is that we’re physically in the same space…because the way we experience that space is a whole other matter. We can try to explain (with variable degrees of success) but we can never take them there with us so they understand! Until we give this effect the most appropriate name, trauma, we don’t deal with it appropriately either…because we just keep on sucking it up and wondering why we struggle and burn out so often and in so many apparently unusual or creative ways. Yet in the case of any other trauma we would work much harder to notice when it was happening, to put a stop to it and heal from it…but how do you heal from something that is relentless and ongoing, which you have to expose yourself to in order to be part of anything in life that has something to do with being around other people or in the world as it has been made to be, which is highly overstimulating and often too much for our differently wired systems?

Cultivating the fierce self-compassion you need to keep your essence intact

Unnecessary exposures to sadness, negativity and grief suck vital life force out of people; take this from a hypersensitive person who knows all too well the cost to health. Learning how to fiercely curate the amount of exposure to negativity that we can cope with as an exercise in self-compassion.

Aspie women compelled to “fix things”

Asperger's can be challenging for any woman; and parenting a child with more typical needs than your own can place those challenges right under a microscope...but you both stand to gain such a lot, in the long run, as I am now discovering. Examining some classic Aspie traits in the light of motherhood...

Too much (not too little) going on

This is an add-on to an earlier post since I just came across “the intense world” theory proposed by of Henry Markram, director of the Brain Mind Center at the Swiss Federal Institute of Technologym, which seems highly relevant to it. In that previous post, entitled High-sensitivity, synesthesia...and hearing tones, seeing lights or other anomalous experiences, … Continue reading Too much (not too little) going on

The synesthesia – sensitivity – chronic pain link

Synesthesia has overlaps with heightened sensitivity and both have overlaps with chronic pain. All of these phenomenon overlap in me so you can see why I am so interested. It's as though chronic pain is the down side of the see-saw on which synaesthesia is the colourful gift at the highest end (I really wouldn't be without it and the sensory adventures it takes me on) and sensitivity is the mixing pot of both, made up of both pluses and minuses, depending on how challenging these heightened sensitivities make the experience of life. Exploring the sensory soup of these cross-over phenomenon, asking whether we are all born with synesthesia as science is now suggesting and looking into all the potential a deeper understanding of them holds for transforming human experience.

Mirror mirror

If some of us feel as though we are floundering under he weight of "feeling too much" then lets take a broader and more optimistic view of this. Together, we are becoming more robust and I suspect the reawakening of the mirror neurone is a signal that we are descaling our furred up neurology in readiness for a bigger experience of all that it means to be human; which is a far less isolated, self-interested, muffled-up-to the ears experience than we have long tended to believe. In my view, this is the stuff of frontline evolution.

That INFJ foible: making a full-time study of ourselves

An INFJ (Myers-Briggs) personality type can make an entire life's career out of researching themselves. Yes, you heard me...a full-time job. And not in the way you think, not as self-obsession or run-amok ego or hypochondria or anything else like that but because, in our view, why would we need any other interface; an alternate, … Continue reading That INFJ foible: making a full-time study of ourselves

Highly Sensitive…and owning it

From today, I'm going to start sharing a whole load of resources for the Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) on my Living Whole Facebook page, as well as creating a resource section on this website. This is a true area of expertise for me since I am one and owning this has felt like such a massive … Continue reading Highly Sensitive…and owning it