A lifetime fuelled by pain and frustration: handling the emotional fallout of long-term undiagnosed autism

A combination of having a blind spot when it comes to your own emotions (alexithymia) and a lifetime of fear around unleashing strong emotions.not to mention the stockpile of anger, frustration and trauma from all the difficult years before diagnosis, can conspire to push strong emotions deep into the body. Exploring how autistic challenges such as these could manifest as chronic illness and especially chronic pain.

Freeze response: the intersection of autism, trauma and chronic illness

What happens when huge amounts of energy get stuck in the body as trauma, leading to a freeze response or shutdown? How does this intersect with chronic conditions such as CFS, fibromyalgia, sensory defensiveness or other syndromes and does being autistic make you more prone to this? How can somatic therapies be used to discharge years of trauma? Exploring through my own deep-dive into the territory.

Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria

Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria is debilitating, devastating, isolating and often quite unbearable and yet nobody that has not experienced it for themselves can imagine what it truly feels like on the inside; there is no point of reference for anyone that isn't wired that way since it is the product of particular genetics plus epigenetics combined with a lifetime of trauma. As a common experience of both autism and ADHD and something I experience myself, this important topic has been on my list of most daunting things to cover for quite some time...here goes.

INFJ “Grip Stress” sheds light on lasting trauma and chronic pain

It's been a while since I wrote about Myers Briggs personality types though the method remains one of the most consistently useful tools I have ever used to come to deeply understand myself. Yesterday, I happened upon a particular foible of each personality type called a “grip stress" state, something I had never come across … Continue reading INFJ “Grip Stress” sheds light on lasting trauma and chronic pain

The serious health risks of 5G

The new 5G technology is set to alter absolutely everything about our planet, and not just the way we access the internet or control our living spaces. From the wellbing of birds and bees, the health of our trees, the effect upon our crops, our water supplies...plus some pretty likely, and severe, effects on the human nervous system and skin, there's a lot that we need to eductate ourselves about, before its too late.

Facing abandonment: the deep trauma within

Abandonment - real or imagined - in childhood, especially very early in life, is considered one of the most serious triggers of deeply ingrained illness and even post traumatic stress, I newly read this morning. How did I not know this, though I have noted many times how my symptoms match those of PTSD. But that’s all about war-zones, being a veteran, seeing many killings, too much destruction and death, isn’t it? Apparently no, not always; and those with it embedded play out some terribly self-destructive themes, many of which are deeply familiar to me. These reactions, the traits, the repeat behaviours…they are like the patchwork of my lifetime's worst experiences and I find the very themes that have triggered the high-adrenalin and sheer nervous exhaustion of my health collapse, over and over again. So, if this is you, have you considered this traumatic root to your unsolved health issues because we are so adept at covering over these earliest traumas, or playing them down as "nothing", that we can forget to give them the attention they crave in order to heal.

Where emotional trauma met hard circumstance: following the trail of lights

How can the marriage of feminine and masculine aspects "as us" result in disharmony and fragmentation of our health? Because their driving impulse is to always collaborate with each other to form a "whole" yet sometimes they join together whether or not they are in their most ideal state. In other words, distorted emotions and dysfunctional circumstances have just as much inclination to work together as the very highest examples they can offer. All they care about, as though a magnetic force is pulling them irresistably into union, is that they sing to the same key. The good news is that this means the key to our recovery from anything we care to mention is already there...within us...since all we have to do is substitute the highest expression of those feminine and masculine aspects for them to collaborate as the wholeness that we think of as wonderful health. Imagine...we have the infrastructure for perfect healing already in place and operational; all we need to do is adjust the focus!

Phoenix rising…allowing that inner fire

Women do this especially well; we tell ourselves we have to keep our unruly emotions in check and are almost too afraid to give them full rein in case we offend anyone or lose people's good opinion but what if the release of those locked away emotions is the very power we seek or holds the key to our transformation; at the very least, our healing?

Love letter to myself

A quarter century in the making - my love letter to myself. A moment of profound healing on the summer solstice anniversary of when it all started...

Sharing this powerful, deeply personal, excercise in transformational reconciliation with you so that perhaps, just maybe, you might find something in it to assist with achieving your own deepest homecoming.