Who knows your pain

When we are in chronic pain, or even an episode of acute pain that seems to go on and on, who do we share that with, can we even expect to share and does it make it better or worse to convey to loved ones what we are going through? Yet, do we need that outlet of saying it like it is and not feeling so isolated in our experience and, if so, where do we get that from, without stirring up the pot to make ourselves feel all the more defeated from over-talking it. This conundrum is familiar territory to anyone who lives with pain, chronic illness, even the disillusionment of daily chronic fatigue. Sharing some home truths, perhaps some helpful perspectives, from my own experience of this highly emotive topic.

Living to your blueprint

Dr Elaine Aron’s work on this topic has been a life-changer for so many people with high-sensitivity since the phrase was not even coined until she came along and gave it this label. Her book, film and website resources are some of the most useful tools I have ever come across and she is cited by pretty-much everyone who speaks out about high sensitivity which, thanks to her, people now do; quite unheard of a couple of decades ago. More and more, high-sensitivity has become a buzz-word and not because its trendy to jump onto its bandwagon but because many of us had very little concept of what made us so different until this point; which allowed everyone else’s opinion of us, that we are “wierd”, “weak”, “neurotic” highly-strung” and so on, to stick. With more interest garnered in it than ever, it's now been shown by studies to be a genetic trait; something a fifth of us are born with…so, not an illness, timidness, weirdness, personality flaw, mental health issue, handicap or lack of backbone (as so often referred to in our families, schools and workplaces). When we turn this around to see High Sensitivity and its traits as a bundle of gifts, we start to live much closer to our personal blueprint.

Getting my own attenton

Its not a level playing field; the way we are attached to our primary caregiver as a child can have profound and long-lasting effects on our immunity and health patterns for the rest of our life, which could explain why some people are much more prone to chronic health issues and other anomolies, even more bizarre sensitivities, than others. Attachment issues have been especially associated with chronic pain, how we experience and handle that pain and how effective we are at seeking help when we need it. This is a deep plunge into the new science around this topic as well as an anecdotally personal look at how to go deeply into this opportunity, when triggered, in order to offer yourself all the attentivenes and tender love you may have lacked in infanthood in order to heal.

Beyond meaning

Where there is no joy left, we can be sure we have excluded the right-brained perspective. When all we can see is the hard wall of the corridor we are apparently walking and the printed signs and arrows on those wall saying we "must" go this way or that, we can be sure we have lost the over-view and its an imprisonment of sorts. "Down there' we can only go one or maybe two or three routes (some of its junctions are confusing thus they seem to offer choices...) but we have lost the very point of the journey if we no longer experience the very joy that makes us want to be here in a human body. So if diagnosis only brings limitation and fear, we need to make sure we don't lose sight of that other perspective...the broader perspective that allows us to see the whole point.

Blazing a trail to a new kind of recovery

I met Kat Barrell just over a year ago...around the time she was diagnosed with stage IIIC ovarian cancer. The woman I got to know and the recovery story that unfolded was remarkable, as was the friendship that was forged over our shared belief in how all things are possible when we believe that we are the creators of our own experience. Daring to think that, when faced with a diagnosis such as cancer, is regarded as such an audacious or even foohardy thing and yet Kat is living testament to how powerfully effective this can be. Sharing her remarkable and inspirational story so that ANYONE facing diagnosis (of any kind) can benefit from the many pearls of wisdom she has to offer.

Claiming my future self

My health has taken a massive leap forwards this year; in fact, I honestly feel superb. After so much stop-starting over the last decade, I can’t hep noticing that the biggest difference is that I have reached the point where my only desire is to live that long-sought “healthy life” in a great feeling body and have no patience left with anything less than being there already; I simply won’t put my life on hold any longer...